UGW #9g and 9h: Verses on Effective Prayer

Understanding God's Will #9g: Other Convicting Verses

Now, that’s a lot to take, I know!  But ... there’s more!  If we really want to examine what sins we might be harboring in our hearts, we would be wise to consider these verses. 
            
Here’s one for husbands.  1 Peter 3:7:  “Husbands, in the same way be considerate as you live with your wives, and treat them with respect as the weaker partner and as heirs with you of the gracious gift of life, so that nothing will hinder your prayers.”  

The degree to which we treat others with consideration and respect, particularly regarding a husband’s treatment of his wife in this verse, is the degree to which our prayers are unhindered.
            
And here are three that scare me:
            
Proverbs 21:13:  “If a man shuts his ears to the cry of the poor, he too will cry out and not be answered.”
            
James 4:17:  “Anyone, then, who knows the good he ought to do and doesn’t do it, sins.” 
            
Romans 14:23:  “... everything that does not come from faith is sin.”

Yikes!  The first verse tells me that God does not listen to us if we ignore those in need.  And the second two broaden the definition of sin.  Sin is not just doing things that we know we shouldn’t do; it’s also sin to not do what we know we should do and to do anything that doesn’t come from faith.  And sin hinders prayer. 
            
This really opens up a whole new side of our responsibility, of what God expects from those of us who call ourselves Christians.  Do we ignore needs that we see?  Do we turn a blind eye at injustice?  Do we fail to treat others kindly?  Do we fail to do the good that we know we should do?  This is sin! 
            
What, in our lives, are we doing that is a result of faithlessness?  Do we hoard money because we don’t have faith in God to provide?  Do we seek our own ways out of trials because we don’t have faith in God to help us through?  Do we look to satisfy our desires outside of the boundaries God has given because we don’t trust that God’s way is best?  Do we fail to obey because we are afraid of what obedience will cost us?  This is sin, too!    
            
We can open up to just about any passage in the Bible and find something we should be convicted about, something that will lead us toward a deeper relationship with Him and a better idea of how to live righteously, which leads us toward more “powerful and effective” prayers.  But how many of us take the time to do that?  How many of us read the Bible with the intention of seeking to live more righteously?  Of getting to know Him better, as He really is?  Or have we become comfortable in our own little world, behind our walls of fear, self-sufficiency, self-centeredness, and sin?    
            
1 John 3:21-23:  “Dear friends, if our hearts do not condemn us, we have confidence before God and receive from Him anything we ask, because we obey his commands and do what pleases him.  And this is his command: to believe in the name of his Son, Jesus Christ, and to love one another as he commanded us.” 
            
Notice that it’s not just an inactive, passive command to avoid doing anything that doesn’t please Him.  It’s an active command that instructs us to live our lives doing the things that please Him.  But we shouldn’t look at obedience as a way to manipulate Him to get what we want or as something that we have to do out of duty or irrational fear or to earn His love.  The desire to obey is the natural response of a heart that properly fears God and that is so full of His love and of love for Him that you want nothing less than to do His Will and bring Him glory. 
            
John 15:7:  “If you remain in me and my words remain in you, ask whatever you wish, and it will be given you.”  Now, if we ended with that verse, it would sound like a blank check.  (Notice, though, that we need to be remaining in Him and to store up His words in our hearts.  That’s a lot of responsibility.)  But we need to go on to the next verse to find out what kind of prayers God is talking about.  Is it really “whatever you wish”? 
            
Verse 8:  “This is to my Father’s glory, that you bear much fruit, showing yourselves to be my disciples.”  God grants the prayers that are centered on bearing fruit for the Father’s glory, that show others that we are His disciples.  And this comes as a result of remaining in Him, which means way more than just reading our Bibles, going to church, and praying every now and then.  Remaining in Him, as a tree branch remains connected to the trunk, means being vitally connected to Him.  It means absorbing and living in His Word, love, power, grace, etc.  It is not a casual thing, and it is not about our wants and desires!
            
When I consider all these verses together, I can see that it doesn’t mean that He will always grant anything that I ask.  Am I abiding in Him daily?  Or am I just running to my Vending Machine God to ask for what I want or think I need?  Do I have my plans, pleasure, and glory in mind, or God’s?  (And here’s a scary question:  Does my life currently show obedience and reflect His glory and His love and His Truth?  How about in my home, in how I treat others, in how I speak and think, when I am in a crowd, when I am alone, etc.?  If I'm not doing that stuff now, what makes God think I'll start doing it if I get what I want?)     




9h: Summing Up Effective Prayer
After really searching the Word for verses on prayer, I’m beginning to believe that God doesn’t just answer prayer based on how much faith we have and on whether or not we claim that it will happen ahead of time.  Yes, we need faith.  That is a necessity.  But it’s not about “performing” or about jumping through hoops to prove how much faith we have.  It’s about the condition of our lives and hearts, about our relationship with Him and with others, and about how closely we are walking with Him and living in His love.  Do we have faith in Him to handle our request?  And no matter how He chooses to answer, do we have enough faith in Him as a good, loving Father to remain close to Him and to praise Him, even if we don't get what we want? 


Summing up all that I’ve learned so far, I’d have to say that our prayers are most effective …
            
- when we are living righteously,
            
- when they are in line with God’s Will and are unselfish and are in Jesus’ name (according to what He wants),
            
- when there are no un-confessed sins blocking our relationship with God (meaning that we need to clear the air with God and others, seeking forgiveness from God and those we have wronged and forgiving those who have wronged us),
            
- when we (especially husbands) treat others with consideration and respect,
            
- when we are doing the good we know we need to do,
            
- when we are living and acting in accordance with our faith and not doing anything that doesn’t come from faith,
            
- when our hearts don’t condemn us (because we have actively searched them and we have righted any wrongs, and not just because we are ignoring any conviction),
            
- when we obey His commands and do what pleases Him,
            
- when we believe in Jesus and are loving one another,
            
- when we are remaining in Him and His words remain in us,
            
- and when we are living for and bearing fruit for His glory!

            
This is a lot to consider.  It is very sobering.  (And how can all those verses about our responsibilities be explained away with Calvinism's "God's Will always happens and everything that happens is God's Will, and we can't do anything about it"?)

But we need to resist the urge to make this list a formula to get what we want or a check-list that we have to do before we can approach God in prayer.  Notice that nowhere in the list does it say anything about having to pray the “right words,” in the “right position,” and with the “right tone-of-voice,” and when you have made yourself “good enough.” 
            
If you don't know where to start with prayer, just talk to Him.  Tell Him what's on your heart and mind, what you're concerned about.  Ask for His help.  Praise Him for the goodness and blessings He's already given you.  Ask Him to guide you in knowing what He wants you to do and pray.  Just talk to Him, as you would to a trusted friend who values your friendship and who wants the best for you and wants to help you because they love you.

It’s all about our heart’s sensitivity to God and our desire to live life with Him, as well as for Him, doing our best to continue transforming ourselves to be more and more like Him.  And this will take our whole lives.  

So we should never let a “check-list” come between us and God.  More important to Him than the particular words we pray or how we pray is simply that we pray - that we let Him deep into our hearts and lives, drawing near to Him in genuineness and humility and dependency on Him, and that we let Him into our plans and join Him in His plans, growing in our understanding of what He wants for our lives and what He wants us to do as we learn to seek His glory and His Kingdom above all.  

And this is why we should pray.  Because He's chosen to work out His Will in cooperation with mankind, through our choices and actions.  And because we need Him.  And because He wants us to let Him near.  He desires an open, honest relationship with every one of us.  That's why Jesus came and died for us, to bridge the gap so that we could once again have an intimate relationship with Him.  (Unlike Calvi-god who only wants more and more glory for himself, at the expense of his creation.)  

He can handle anything we bring His way; we just need to learn to be willing to accept His answers.  And this becomes a lot easier when we learn that He really does love us.  (Unlike Calvi-god who says he loves everyone but who only really loves a very few "elected" people and who created the multitude of people, the non-elect, simply so that he could hate them, cause them to reject him, and then punish them for it in hell because it brings him some kind of sick glory.  Who would trust the love of a god like that?  If he's capable of that then he's capable of deceiving even the elect into thinking they're saved but then sending them to hell anyway.  Just because he wants to.  Because it makes him happy or brings him glory or whatever.  Calvi-god is a sick, demonic god!)    
            


Now, no matter how “righteously” we live, we will still struggle from time to time with our own desires, some selfish ones and some for good things that He is not willing to grant for His own reasons.  But the longer and closer we walk with Him, the “easier” it gets to refocus and to allow Him to answer the way He wants.  But it takes remembering His goodness to us and His love and His displays of power in the past.  It’s so easy to get discouraged when we take our eyes off of Him and what He is capable of.  So we need to be immersing ourselves in Him daily if we want to have the greatest amount of peace and joy possible.  Peace and joy in the midst of heartbreaking unanswered prayer do not come to us apart from abiding in Him daily.   
            
And I think that’s what I’m learning to do, through all of the unanswered prayers and waiting.  I’m learning to not let my faith in Him hinge on how He chooses to answer.  I’m learning to let Him be God!  

In the name of transparency and dependence on Him, it’s okay to pray for something specific.  I believe that He can do what I am asking ... if He chooses to.  I have no doubt that He is capable.  But in the name of humility, I have to allow Him to answer as He wants.  (And this is not always easy to do, even though it should be when you realize what a good, loving, wise God He is.)  

I need to be sensitive and moldable and to allow God to purify my requests and change my desires to be more in line with His Will.  When I get hung up on a specific answer or on what I think I “need” then I get tunnel-vision and I lose my ability to see what God may actually be doing in response to my request. 
            
But to be honest, it is hard sometimes to lay our requests down before the Lord - to place them in His hands fully - when the answer is so important to us.  And it’s especially hard when the Lord seems to be taking His time, and we want our answer NOW!  (And I realize that I cause stress for myself because there are many times that I want my answer early – earlier than it needs to come.  I want the assurance that it is already there, when instead God is telling me to trust that He can and will handle it, that the right answer will be there when it is the right time, that He won't let me down.) 
            
But these times are very important, teachable moments in our lives.  Difficult and heartbreaking, but important and teachable.  And they can either be times to get bitter and angry, or times to draw near to God and experience enormous growth in our Christian character.  

Maybe that’s part of the reason why God seems so silent, hidden, and unresponsive most of the time – to force us to decide if we will turn our backs on Him when we don't get what we want, if we will remain half-hearted “what’s-in-it-for-me” Christians ... or to decide that we will commit to Him fully, even though He is a mysterious and confusing and sometimes frustrating God who can't be manipulated by us and who doesn't always give us what we want when we want it.     

There's a lot more to pray (even unanswered prayer) than we realize!  

(And far more than Calvinists realize when they essentially view prayer as nothing more than a formality.)



For the posts in this series, see the "Understanding God's Will" label in the sidebar (or find the original series, without the Calvinism info, by clicking here).

Most Popular Posts Of The Month:

List of Calvinist Preachers, Authors, Theologians, Websites, etc.

Why Is Calvinism So Dangerous? (re-updated)

Is The ESV (English Standard Version) a Calvinist Bible?

Leaving Calvinism: Comments from Ex-Calvinists #11

As evil as it gets: Calvinism on babies and the unreached

The Cult of Calvinism

When Calvinism Infiltrates Your Church

How to Tell if a Church, Pastor, or Website is Calvinist (simplified version)

The Bible vs. Calvinism: An Overview by Patrick Myers (a great resource)

A Random Verse That Destroys Calvinism (And "Is The ESV a Calvinist Bible?")